Disability Can Cost You Something You Cannot Replace

When we talk about the cost of disability, money is usually one of the first things that comes to mind. Medical bills, equipment, transportation, home modifications—the list can get long pretty quickly. But some of the biggest costs don't come with a price tag.

Sometimes it's time. Sometimes it's a career you spent years building. Sometimes it's an experience you don't get another chance to have.

I missed my nephew's wedding. Not because I didn't want to be there, but because the logistics of getting there with my disability simply didn't work. There are some experiences you can reschedule or find another way to enjoy. A wedding isn't one of them. You can't recreate that day later because you finally figured out the transportation, accessibility, assistance, or whatever other piece of the puzzle stood in the way.

And that's something I've learned about living with a disability: the logistics of it all can make choices for you before you ever get the chance to make them for yourself.

The same thing can happen with a career. You can adapt, retrain, find a different way to work, or build something completely new. But that doesn't necessarily replace the years you invested, the opportunities you might have had, the income you might have earned, or the direction you thought your career was going.

I became disabled, so there is a “before” in my life that I can remember and compare to where I am now. Someone born with a disability may experience these things differently, but that doesn't mean there aren't losses, barriers, missed opportunities, or frustrating logistics there too. Our experiences aren't identical, and they don't have to be. At some point, all of us are trying to figure out how to live within the circumstances we have—and sometimes adapt around circumstances we never chose.

Adapting can help us continue. It can create new opportunities and sometimes lead us somewhere we never expected to go. But I don't think we have to pretend that means nothing was lost along the way.

What has disability—or another major life change—made you miss, change, or choose differently simply because the logistics got in the way?